We go into every situation with expectations. That’s unavoidable. Our brains are meaning-making machines, and when we don’t know what’s going to happen (which, of course, we don’t – ever), we make up stories about …what’s going to happen. And that means we have expectations. I’d hazard a guess that even the most advanced Zen masters have expectations. This is …
Every leader’s least favorite thing
Firing someone is no fun. But when they’re not performing, and they’ve been given multiple chances and appropriate coaching and training, it’s necessary. It’s tempting to let things keep muddling along, especially if the person appears to be trying. You feel bad for them, of course. But letting things go on too long is a very bad idea. For one …
Understanding ≠ Agreement
Throughout your career and your life, you’ll experience different levels of agreement, disagreement, and conflict. These days, some of it (maybe most of it) will be about the current state of politics and, well, All The Things going on. Some of it will be about what’s happening in your workplace. And some of it will be about Life Stuff. All …
Humor, logic, and belief
Like it or not, we’re in an extremely politicized time. Whichever side you’re on (and if you’re reading this, and know me at all, I imagine you’re on the democratic side), it’s hard. It’s exhausting. And at work, you may be feeling like you’re treading on eggshells scattered across thin ice. I’m a solo practitioner, and my clients naturally self-select …
A little respect, please
I’m not one to make wild generalizations, but I think it’s safe to say that everyone, no matter who they are or what they believe, wants to feel respected. BUT – and it’s a significant BUT – there’s a difference between earned respect and owed respect. It’s generally understood that people in positions of power are “owed” respect, because of their title, …
Whether the weather…
There’s an old tongue-twister that goes like this: I can’t imagine what the people in the path of Hurricane Helene are experiencing or, as I write this, what havoc the rapidly-spinning-up Hurricane Milton will wreak. This is change on a monumental scale. Sadly, it demonstrates all too clearly how people on the outskirts of the change, people observing the change, …
Where does Poor Performance come from?
What’s at the root of so-called “poor performance”? We tend to look at an employee’s – or friend’s, family member’s, customer’s, a stranger’s – behavior as a “thing,” an entity unto itself. But is it really? We look at an employee’s behavior, whether “good” or “bad,” and call it “performance.” But performance doesn’t come out of nowhere. It’s always based …
Got cats? Let’s herd ’em!
Once upon a time, I had ten cats. Yes, it was a lot. Yes, it was very furry. Yes, I went through a lot of kitty litter! Maybe I’m stretching a metaphor to the breaking point, but in my experience, trying to get all stakeholders in a change initiative heading in the right direction can be a whole lot like …
Why won’t they change?
I know it’s hard to believe, but there are people in this world who refuse to change. (Yes, that was me being Captain Obvious.) They know they’re stuck in ways of thinking and acting that don’t support their career or their life, but they say things like, “I’m too old to change” (which I’ve heard from people in their 40s), …
Are you the company doormat?
My clients are nice people. That’s not a bad thing. As long as they’re not too nice. I was talking with one client recently who wanted help learning how to manage what seemed to them like an abundance of toxic situations in the different jobs they’d had over the years. What could be done to avoid, or at least deal with, …