There’s an elephant in the room. It’s the conversation you don’t want to have. It’s the thing you’re uncomfortable about sharing. It’s the topic you’re anxious about discussing. Whatever it is, you think about it often – but never straight on; always kind of sideways, like when you look out the corner of your eye because you don’t want to …
Do you know how to ask? 3 steps to get the best response.
Do you know how to ask? Your mother taught you to always say Please and Thank You. And that’s a good thing, of course. But, assuming you want the best, most useful response to your ask, there’s a bit more to it than that! 1. What do you want? All too often people make vague, unclear requests that require the …
Will you or won’t you?
“I can do that.” But will you? “I can do that” means you have the capacity, skills, knowledge, time, and resources to do this thing. “I will do that” means you have the motivation, intention, desire, and drive to do it, as well as the capacity, skills, and so on. I’d much rather hear someone say, “I will do that,” than “I can do …
Why are difficult conversations so dang difficult?!
Those conversations. The ones that make us anxious, frustrated, worried. The ones we postpone and avoid. Whether it’s an ongoing disagreement with your partner, an employee who keeps making the same mistakes, a kid who persistently “forgets” to take out the trash, an aging parent, or your neighbor with the barking dog – whatever it is, there are some conversations …
Negotiating evolving roles – with ease
A few days ago, someone in my Facebook group asked how to open a conversation with her daughters about how their roles are changing. She’s getting older, and her daughters are adults. It’s what happens. Children become adults, and the parental role evolves. Adults grow older, and the children’s role evolves. It happens in business, too. Newbie employees gain experience, …
The dance of connection
A friend mentioned recently that she and her partner experience a lot of near misses in their interactions. As she put it, “communication zings by,” and it’s only later that she realizes what she heard maybe wasn’t exactly what was said – and vice versa. And this is a couple who’ve been happily together for over 20 years! We all know that different …
Three steps for handling chronic complainers
The chronic complainer. We’ve all encountered them. They love describing all the things that are wrong in the world – and not just once. It’s the same story every time we encounter them. And they suck the energy out of the room! We quickly start avoiding them, whether by running to the bathroom when we see them coming, or choosing …
When they don’t say “thank you”
You’re generous. They don’t say “thank you.” It’s a slap in the face. Why, you might think, did I even bother? And it’s hard to retain a sense of connection with your feelings of generosity, never mind your sense of connection with the other person. How, you might think, can they be so rude and ungrateful? In the end, you have three …
Interview: Conflict Transformation
Beth Buelow’s Introvert Entrepreneur podcast is a gem for anyone in business and, of course, especially for introverts. She interviewed me on questions of conflict transformation, the need for empathy in conflict, and what empathy (and conflict) really mean. It was a blast, and I hope you enjoy it as much as we did! http://theintrovertentrepreneur.com/2017/12/21/ep163-grace-judson-conflict-transformation/ ShareShare
How is your “house” decorated?
One of my favorite quotes comes from the Sufi poet Hafiz: The words you speak become the house you live in. Think about that for a moment. How often do you judge yourself, call yourself names, berate yourself – all in ways you’d never inflict on anyone else? This morning, my husband made the wise and true point that we …